morning epiphany

I had an epiphany today.  As I was enjoying my shower and listening to news on the radio about the front running candidates vying for the presidential republican seat and their respective plans to fix everything that's wrong with the world, a thought came to me that could do just that with no more effort than a stroke of the presidential pen.

Illegal immigration, the national debt, high unemployment, and over population are four of the biggies besetting our boys in Washington and I think I found a quick fix for all of that and we might actually be better off than letting congress dream up something more toxic.

This is so simple I'm amazed no one's thought of it before.  All Uncle Sam needs to do is grant citizenship to any illegal immigrant who pays a citizenship fee of $10,000.  10k times the estimated 20 million illegals in this country and you got some serious coinage filling the government coffers.  No doubt, many illegals will refuse to shell out 10k to stay.  Sure, 10 grand is a lot of money for a legit social security number but, looking at it from a different angle, it's equivalent to the average annual federal tax a legal U.S. citizen pays just to keep the IRS from knocking on their door.  By shelling out 10k, an illegal can emerge from the shadows and join the mainstream job market like everyone else and hold their heads up high as they hand that payroll check to the bank teller for some honest-to-goodness greenbacks sanctioned by the federal reserve to spend like free men.

Of course, there are always choices.  This is the land of the free and the U.S. government would have a contingency plan for anyone who refuses to buy their citizenship.  Any illegal who can't or won't pay the 10k fee will have a choice of three options.  Deportation, garnishment, or slavery.

Deportation means just what it says.  Repeat border-crossers will require being chipped so our intelligence networks can track their movements from outer space to make sure they stay where they're sent.  Garnishment means the 10k will be deducted from their pay checks, plus interest.  If they're working illegally, their employer will be responsible for payment.  Slavery....  perhaps indentured servitude might be a more appropriate term.  Illegals can work off their 10 grand debt by working for honest, tax-paying citizens who will provide food, clothing, and shelter in exchange for all those chores most folks would rather not do. Chores like mowing the lawn, cleaning the pool, pulling weeds, taking the kids to soccer practice, cleaning the garage, doing laundry, etc.  In some cases, getting a part time job that direct deposits the paycheck in the patron's account. Factories can use indentured servants to offset the low wages of Chinese labor and save even more by cutting all that cost for transportation.  After a set period of time, determined by the patrons in an iron clad contract, the indentured servant can earn citizenship and freedom if they satisfy all conditions of the contract.

These rules go for everyone including anchor babies and drug lords.

Subsequently, since each illegal born will cost another 10,000 bucks, the newly legal work force will reduce their population growth to tolerable levels, thus reducing the welfare burden.

Now, isn't this a better idea than Obama's amnesty plan?